What is Your Purpose?

What does it mean to you to live your purpose?  Do you have a purpose?  

I’ll be totally honest when I say that for YEARS (ok more realistically, the first ⅘ of my life (I’m 32 right now)) I had no freaking clue.  And not only did I have no clue, I was too SCARED to even TRY to find out.  I spent years doing what I thought I should be doing aka going to school, getting the best grades I could, graduating, living on my own, getting a well-respected job .. blah .. blah .. blah.  I had no idea what I was doing.  I had no idea who I was.  Lost didn’t even begin to describe my feelings during that time.  

I’ll also be totally honest when I say that now I know exactly what my purpose is (it’s to change the world btw (because the ones who are crazy enough to think that they can, are the ones who do)) and I only have that knowledge from doing EVERYTHING that I didn’t think would make me successful or that I “should” be doing.  

How does this relate to health you ask?  Well because the same was true for my health (both physical and mental).  I spent years killing myself with not eating enough (ever), then eating way too much, then following meal plans and macros .. and exercising every day to not exercising at all, to FINALLY getting to a space where I eat for fuel AND pleasure AND because I know my body and exercising or moving my body because it feels good, AND (sometimes) it challenges me AND because it makes me feel like superwoman.  

So when I ask what it means to live your purpose, I know that ALL of that is part of it. Because the years that I spent worrying about how many grams of fat I was ingesting or how many minutes I had spent on the elliptical?  I damn sure wasn’t living any part of my purpose.  I was so consumed with FEAR that there was no room for purpose (or anything else if I’m still holding the honest stick).  

So I ask you, are you living your purpose?  Can you feel it in your soul?  In your gut?  If not, what’s holding you back?