Recently I traveled from Scottsdale, AZ to Boston, MA. The trip took me approximately 6 days and I covered roughly 2600 miles. As I was driving I realized there were quite a few similarities between various life lessons about confidence and my experience making the trek across the country.
This move meant so much more to me than just changing my geographical location and heading back to my hometown because in so many ways I also felt it was an expression of my own coming home to myself. I decided to make significant changes in my business in addition to the significant change in my latitude and longitude and I honestly couldn’t be happier.
I decided to compile my thoughts in a five part blog series entitled Not All Those Who Wander Are Lost : Life Lessons on Confidence (from a cross-country road trip).
This is Part I:
1. The Little Things Matter
When I was packing up my one bedroom apartment to initially make the move, I knew I had to make a lot of things fit into a tiny space. I started giving away the excess and actually began to enjoy the process of heavily cleansing my home. I had eyeballed everything to fit neatly into the trunk, a little bit of the front seat, and maybe an inch or two of the back seat (wanted to give the pup as much room as possible).
I had gotten most of the car all packed up when I started bringing in the last of the “little things”. My essential oil collection, the abundance plant a previous client had given me, my favorite pillows from my bed. The list seemed to go on and on and I quickly saw that I had not left enough room at all. What I realized in that moment is that although I had initially discounted these items, the reality was that these were the things that were more important or of greater impact than almost any of the larger items.
I think the same is true when building confidence. We often easily dismiss (or don’t even think about) the little things, the fact that you did reach out to that person you met on the train who wanted to collaborate but was slightly intimidating or sign up to teach extra classes in front of a larger crowd than you’re used to but these are the “little things” that are building your confidence to eventually do or make the bigger moves (and more importantly believe that you can).
So I ask you, where in your life are you discounting the “little things”? Where could you find a moment to take a step back to acknowledge and offer praise of the little things you’ve done that you were terrified of or didn’t think you could do?
2. Old “Stuff” Doesn’t Leave Room for the New
Like I talked about in #1, once I made the decision to move (and make that move in a car), I quickly started purging stuff. I went through every box, folder, and old notebook that I had been carrying around from all the other moves before this one (this wasn’t my first rodeo, folks). I got rid of clothes that hadn’t been worn in months and stuff that should never be worn again; I got rid of old college papers (why was I still carrying those around exactly?), and even came across old parenting manuals from when I was toddler (not sure how or why I ended up with them anyways!). By the time I was ready to go, I was down to the bare minimum. Clothes, computer, phone, bedding, and the more sentimental items (per #1).
And ya wanna know what? Not only did I not miss any of the stuff that I threw away or donated, I felt pounds lighter, free really. I knew I had just cleared so much space (and energy) for new stuff, experiences, and relationships in my future home. And I didn’t miss any of the stuff I gave away. None of it! In fact, I can’t even remember most of what got re-homed, and I only threw it out a few weeks ago.
So my question then is what are you still holding onto that is stopping you from moving forward? When it comes to building confidence we create situations and relationships that are new and unfamiliar (in order to grow and step more fully into the version of ourselves who can do those things) but if there is “stuff” (emotional or physical) in the way, we won’t be able to get very far.
Here’s my invitation, maybe a challenge if you will; I invite you to go and purge your world as if you were going to drive cross country if your current vehicle. Up for it? I’d love to hear how it goes: firstname.lastname@example.org